Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Something has been stirring within me for quite some time now, craving freedom, expansion, and adventure. It is undoubtedly the ancient part of me, my eternal soul, asking for a significant change in routine and environment in order to grow in the ways it set out to in this lifetime. It wants to fully experience the magic and abundance that is available to all of us if we just have the courage to step outside of what is familiar and fall (with faith) into the great abyss of the unknown.
So after two unique years of working and living at my old boarding school, I’ve listened to the call for something more. I’ve quit my secure administrative job, a job that I know gives my family great comfort, and my boyfriend and I are taking off for an indefinite period of time for a massive adventure through Mexico and Latin America. We have became very aware that this is a unique window of time in our lives that we will never get back, so we just have to go for it or else we may always regret it.
I don’t think I’ve ever stood at such a significant crossroads: a path of security, stability, predictability, and traditional markers of success going one direction; and one of the unknown, faith, creativity, and soul going the other. It should seem scarier than it currently feels, but I’m mostly just filled with excitement, which reaffirms my decision.
From all my spiritual reading and studying of medical intuition I’ve come to know that following the inner voice of the soul is not only what is essential for true happiness and meaning in life, but also physical health. So this is my own spiritual experiment, with myself as the guinea pig. I want to live what I constantly preach to my energy healing clients, which is the absolute importance of following soul, of working through fear, of not making decisions to please others or society, and trusting that the Universe will take care of you when heart/intuition is leading the way.
“Leap and the net will appear,” said John Burroughs. Well, I’m majorly leaping! The beautiful thing is that I am not fearful of where I will earn my money. I truly believe that by having such an open mind and open heart, with a fundamental desire to discover my gifts and help others, that opportunities will come forward that will take care of me financially. I have also been working two jobs since February to allow me precious time and space for deep reflection without financial stress in order to determine carefully where I want to pour my energy. I am so grateful for this breathing room, and am proud of myself for making it possible.
Growing up I had an obsession with being perfect and one day achieving the material tokens of a “successful” life. At age 13, after visiting New York City for the first time, I decided I would be an investment banker and live in a penthouse on 5th Avenue. The dream, right? Although I have definitely strayed from that money-centered life plan, over the years I have checked off the boxes of what I felt were requirements in order to be considered a success: I graduated top in my class in university, I got my master’s degree in psychology, and I ultimately landed a great job that offered benefits, RRSP contributions, drastically reduced food and housing costs, and other perks that become more and more appealing as we get older. Shouldn’t that have been enough?
But the funny thing is, now I just crave freedom and joy. In her awesome book “The Earth is Hiring” Peta Kelly writes, “The New Way is not just about having more money at the end of the month. Success as we'd been taught isn't sufficient. Success to our generation looks and feels completely different to what it looked and felt like to generations before us.” I am excited to start living and experimenting with this new definition of success.
I used to care so painfully much about what others thought about me and fitting in, but now this fortunately has much less of an influence on me. There are people, likely even some who have been closest to me at times in my life, who may not understand this decision, or may think I’m making the wrong choice. In her book “You are a Badass” Jen Sincero writes, “We give a lot of lip service to the idea that anything is possible, as we all grow up with posters of kittens and baby seals on our walls that say follow your dreams on them, but should you actually do something radical, all the flashing lights and sirens go off.” After all, here I am, nearly 30, taking off with no set plan and spending the money I “should” by putting toward a down payment on a house. Not to mention getting married and having babies. But I’m at peace with my path. This beautiful life of mine is not to be dictated by the visions of others.
I feel so tremendously lucky to have found a partner with the same sense of adventure, the same desire to stretch the boundaries of what is considered normal or successful, and to create a colourful, passionate, inspired life. Despite all the unknowns ahead of us, I feel total confidence in our bond and know that we’ll be able to navigate through the inevitable ups and downs that we will face on the road.
I want to see what can happen when you prioritize soul over security and have complete trust in the Universe to provide. “God will not have his work made manifest by cowards,” said Ralph Waldo Emerson.
I want the time and space to dedicate to building my intuitive healing business.
I want to live each day out of conscious choice rather than out of habit and routine.
I want to bring forth ideas from the depth of my being, to show up bold and expansive in this world, instead of simply following and mirroring the paths of others.
I want to be surrounded by people who are as in awe of the magic of life as I am, and want to use their strengths to make our world even more beautiful.
I want to be entrepreneurial.
I want to be inspired by the stories and passions of others and be open to how they may contribute to my own path-finding.
I want to follow my intuition, as opposed to making decisions to make others happy.
I want to truly experience life as the party that it can, and should, be. “It's time for us to show the world how good it's really meant to be,” says Kelly.
I want soulful music, bright colours, new flavours, and bold fabrics
Sincero also writes, “The problem is that once we’re older and ‘wise,’ many people trade in living fully in their purpose for more ‘grown-up’ visions of life that range from the merely passable to the full-on sucking. They’ve bought into this idea that being responsible = not having fun anymore, that waking up feeling excited about life is for the young, and once we’re older, we need to trade that in, settle down and be more ‘realistic.’ Yawn. I’m not talking about being an irresponsible jerk or doing the same things we did when we were younger, but I’m talking about continuously living our dreams, no matter what stage of life we’re in, instead of settling for mediocrity because we don’t believe anything else is available or appropriate.”
I will never get to see what I am truly capable of bringing forth into this world until I have to depend entirely on myself for my financial stability. Although somewhat daunting, this thought is also very exciting. The worst that can happen is that I eventually realize I miss the comforts of home, I don’t want to be away from friends and family, I don’t like being an entrepreneur, I run out of money, and I return home and get a job just like the one I left. But, it also could end up better than I ever could have dreamed. I’m willing to roll the dice.
My soul is a wild one, and she’s ready to be freed. We don’t have to wait until we’re miserable somewhere to make a change and take the leap. Sometimes there just comes a time when you know in your heart of hearts, as scary or inconvenient as it may be, that you must move on in order to keep growing. Just because I know that I’m no longer meant to have a desk job, I have only gratitude for the last two years. Gratitude for the stability this position offered me, the skills I was able to develop, the places I got to visit, the beautiful connections I made with students, the sense of community, and for being the reason I moved to Vancouver Island and met my wonderful man.
On October 21st Chad and I will be getting on a plane with his sweet dog, Wayne, and heading for Sayulita, Mexico. We’ll be in Mexico until the new year, and by then we’ll have decided where to plant our roots next. Home will be wherever we are together, and I couldn’t be more excited to see where this grand adventure takes us.
With light and love, Sarah xo
PS. Make sure to follow me on Instagram at @the.radiant.rebel to stay up-to-date on our travels and learnings!